Maddox Dick Masterson

#1 - Nuclear Fucking Power, Kicking Ass, Surge Pricing, Meat

#2 - Ask for a raise, Malala Yousafzai, Beer, Income-based Fines

#3 - Genetic Engineering, Rude People, #freethenipple, More Nudity (International Genital Index)

#4 - Encrypting Everything, Lesbians, Time Travel, Abortion

#6 - Euthanasia, Guns, Retirement Homes, Monkeys

#7 - Riots, The Apple Watch, Dumb People, Polio

#5 - Oculus Rift, Soap, Addresses, Anonymous Comments

#8 - The Corporation, Critical Thinking, Cuteness, Boxes

#10 - Free Birth Control, Refrigeration, Legalized Prostitution, Illustrated Condoms

#9 - Ronald Reagan, Satellites, Superhero Stance, Temperance

#54 - People Who Complain About Being Cold All The Time, Perfectionists, Forest Fires

Biggest Problem - #7

#38 - Ghostbusting the Patriarchy, Black Income Disparity, Type 2 Diabetes, Automatic Hand Dryers

#41 - Hay Fever, Recently Enlightened People, Bathroom Attendants

#39 - Sex With The Ex, Love, Rose Peddlers, Valentine's Day

#27 - Engineering Sexism, Burlesque Dancers, Facebook

#29 - Bro-Downs, Celebrity Worship, Undercooked Rice, Hipsters

#47 - Wash Me, Guardians of the Galaxy, Losing Your Cellphone

#45 - Utah, Mars One, Loud Talkers, Penis Injuries

#13 - Monkey Copyrights, Female Genital Mutilation, Death of Phone Calls, Beats by Dre

#17 - Shitty Passengers, Nepotism, Jennifer Lawrence's Tits, Parents Television Council

#18 - Transportation Security Administration (TSA), Outrage Porn, Babies

Biggest Problem - #11

#49 - Reefer Madness, Wage Gap Truthers, Getting Too High

The Biggest Problem in the Universe - #6

#56 - Honor Killings, High Heels, Teleology, The "Are you still watching" button on Netflix

#20 - Transgendered MMA Fighters, iPhone 6

#22 - California Drought Dickbags, Hippies

#50 - Unexpected Guests, First-Time Child Experts, High School Prom

#57 - Social Justice Warriors (SJW), Soy, Shitty Dads

#51 - Flowers, Earthquakes, Gossip, Bachelor Parties

#46 - Vine Stars, BBC

#25 - Motorcycle Fairings, Pyramid Schemes / Herbalife, Catcalling, Pennies

Biggest Problem - #9

#55 - Speech Recognition, Pregnancy, Pizza Snobs, Tractors Pulling Out In Front Of You

#36 - Loud Muffler Douchebags, Jury Duty, Non-Porn Porn, Changing Your Sheets

#52 - Bicyclers, Armchair Economists

#15 - Facebook Satire Tags, Emoji / Icons, Militarized Police, Spiderwoman's Ass

#44 - Smartphone Fact-finding Fuckheads, Well-Intentioned Idiots

#23 - Snapchat Pictures of Not Tits, Ebola Alarmists, Chatty Uber Drivers, Meetings

#32 - Christmas Gifts, Sony, That Whole Virgin-Birth Thing, Ugly Christmas Sweater Parties

#40 - People Who Love To Sleep, Newscasterbation

#31 - Audio Engineers Deleting Podcasts, Hunger, Gourmet Dog Food

#26 - People Who Don't Curb Their Dogs, Diamonds, Fake Lawns, Chaise Lounge Sofas

Biggest Problem - #8

#16 - Cold Lasers, Game Pre-Purchases, Missing Your Fantasy Football League, Game Post-Purchases

#14 - Maddox Gets No Credit, People Who Can't Read Social Cues, Wine Snobs

#33 - Made In China, New Year's Resolutions

#19 - Fireball Cinnamon Whiskey, Flat Tires, The Washington Redskins Controversy, AIDS

#48 - Obesity, Income Tax, Bacon Worship