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Fatted Calves
Get in Line
The Curling Fields
The Legend of John Arby
Lord of the Beeflands
Meatcraft
Smoke Mountain
The Worker's Lament
Shrieking Like a Scalded Rabbit While the Hand of God Plucks Me Out of the Club Before the Bass Drops
All Quiet on the Frontal Lobe: A McKinsey Global Institute Analysis
Seventeen Hours of Uninterrupted Sleep After Taking Sudafed Sinus and Fighting God
Rush Limbaugh Falls Off Rainbow Road and Becomes a Gender-Neutral Bathroom Because Lakitu Refused to Help
Are You a Narc? Wait... Don't Answer That... I'll Be Right Back. ::Toilet Flush::
Hoping This Seventh Email in the Past Hour Finds You Feral but Functioning
Casting Corporate Spells with the Unpromotable Account Baddies over Lukewarm Diet Cokes
Nobody Leaves This Party Until My Mom’s Zenergy Velour Reversible Vest From Chico’s Is Returned
Summertime Gladness
Quick 11PM Bandwidth Check with My Adderallic Scrum Cult of Patagonia-Vested Disruptors
No One Knows What the Needle Is, but We’re Moving It (Non-Billable)
Everyone Knows That Frothing Berserkers Can't Be Tamed Using J.O. Crystals Alone
Channeling My Divorced Energy Into Tanking Twitter While Disproving the Myth That Rich People Are Smart
Ignoring Every Traffic Signal Under an Altima Blood Moon
Clappin' Cheeks for Jesus (Respectfully Tho)
Champagne Dreams & Delicate Hamster Bone Paste Wishes
Crate Digging at the Dillard's Clearance Center in Search of the Ugliest Pair of Striped Girbaud Jorts in Existence
Bath Bombs over Sad Dad
Demanding Martial Law on Every Next Door Post Confusing Fireworks With Gunshots in the 45th Ward
Carving Through the Gelatinous Masses Like a Hot Knife Only To Discover the QR Code for Enlightenment Is Behind a Paywall
Confidently Failing at Everything in Life (Except Owning TF Out of This High and Tight Crew Cut)
This is Going to Be the Year that Changes Everything. Oh No. Wait No. 2025 is Going to Be My Year.
I'm Not Here for Eno or Basinski I'm Here for a Secret Third Thing
Doctor Diagnosed Me with Terminal Cases of Sleep WAPnea and Clavicle Realness
GCISD vs. The Diversity Industrial Complex
Bypassing COPPA and Mainlining Royalty-Free Trash Consciousness on YouTube Kids
I’m Not Here for Eno or Basinski I’m Here for a Secret Third Thing
Squeaky Lee Lullaby
Thoughtfluencing Myself Into a Parasocial Hallucinationship
Screaming in My Jeep Because I Heard Antifa Was Coming to Kentucky to Steal Christmas
The Mounting Rage From Watching Hours of Conspiracy Videos on YouTube (This Drywall Isn't Going to Punch Itself)
Waking in a Warm Pool of Serenity OH NO There's That Rage Again
Transcending Both Time and Space Whilst Screaming "LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT!" in My Nephew's Face
That Sense of Accomplishment After Perfectly Applying a Thin Blue Line + Punisher Skull Sticker to My Jeep After Three Failed Attempts
Alexa Pee My Pants
Surgically Removing Chaos Emeralds after the YSL Summer Party
Hotboxing A Coffin I Bought on the Dark Web
Like and RT for A Chance to Win 10,000 Silica Packs Delivered Straight to Your Mouth
I Will Face Satan and Walk Backwards into Heaven
Subscribing to Rock Hard Abs in the Metaverse for $25 and Calling it Self-Care
A Strangely Isolated Place to Ugly Cry (Beefmode Dub Remix '99)
Oops! All Hot Mush
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